New Start

I have just seen that I only made 2 entries before and they were when I was living in Japan and had my RA. Well no surprise I still have RA :-) but am happy to say it is MUCH better than my other 2 entries. I have had some bad times but I am now quite stable so OK.

Sad today

Well today I went back to the hospital to have my blood tests etc. I have been having a bad time with my left foot to the point that I cant walk so I knew that I wasn't well but my markers on the tests have gone way up again, not quite as bad as when I started the treatment but nearly. This has set me back, I HATE this disease and how it makes me feel, I am losing confidence as I am gaining weight very quickly and cant lose it as I cant exercise (cant walk so cant exercise) and the doctor has now increased the MTX again and I have new stronger anti-inflammatories. I have to ice my foot 4 times a day and keep it raised as much as possible and not allowed to walk to much... Mia and Gian are bigger now so it helps but I hate not being able to do things when I want... Graham has been just great as always and has gone to get all my drugs, I have so many now and the doctor wants to put me on steroids... I have read a little and am not sure if I will or not, will read more before making the decision.

1st day of medication

Today is my first day of taking my medication. I feel very nervous, scared, sick and I haven't even taken them yet. On one hand I know they will eventually help me but on the other hand I don't want to experience the side effects - nausea, diarrhea, liver failure, hair loss, pneumonia... so looking at the 3 little tablets in front of me was quite hard. I felt like I was taking something that could poison me but if I didn't take them I would get worse anyway, no real choice. So I took them. It is now an hour later and I feel OK, waiting for something to happen... I will now go and write some letters so as to take my mind off it, I know I will be OK, I just have to think positive!!

Tablets taken: 3 x MTX, 3 ibuprofen, 1 tablets for stomach, 1 vitamin D, 1 multi vitamin.